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Helton Law Firm, PLLC

Tips for avoiding arguments about the kids after divorce

Parents in Tennessee who share custody of their children will need to continue to communicate after a divorce. Succeeding at co-parenting requires perseverance. Negative emotions and hostile comments could easily erupt between ex-spouses when discussing their children, but focusing on the needs of the children should help alleviate arguments over time.

One helpful tactic a person could employ is to avoid subjects outside of childcare. Even if the other parent baits the person with derogatory comments, the person should avoid responding to an attack or criticism. Reminding the other parent about acceptable topics of conversation will sometimes be necessary. This tactic could support the goal of creating a co-parenting relationship that functions for the benefit of the children.

Because raising children presents ongoing challenges for both parents, problems and disputes will inevitably occur. Instead of blaming the other parent for the problem and inciting an argument, a better approach would be to propose solutions. For example, an angry text concerning a missed soccer game might be a source of conflict, but, if the other parent replies with an idea about how to share the soccer schedule more effectively, then the conversation could shift toward solutions. By focusing on solutions, an unhappy situation might be diffused.

Before co-parenting can begin, two parents need to negotiate the terms of child custody during the divorce process. A person can enlist an attorney to aid in this process. An attorney could inform the person about parental rights and how the law could impact custody if the parents cannot reach a mutual agreement prior to going to family court. Issues such as who makes medical decisions, which schools the children will attend and religious training might all need to be addressed during negotiations.

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